Below is the better part of a letter I wrote to Move to Amend volunteers in January 2022 to let them know that I would be stepping down as National Director (internal logistical details have been omitted from the version below).
I felt our volunteers deserved to know all that had gone into this decision, so this is my effort to provide that honesty and transparency.
There are many others of you who may not be active volunteers now but who have supported this work and been committed to Democracy Unlimited/Move to Amend -- and by extension my work and career -- through the years, and I feel that if you're interested, you deserve to know the backstory too.
And each time I have passed along the news of my stepping back, folks have followed up asking why and what I'm planning next -- so I'm posting this letter here to make this information available to anyone who is curious.
As of May 2022 my responsibilities with Move to Amend and Democracy Unlimited are complete, and honestly that feels so good! I'm pretty excited for new chapters but also very committed to leaning into my current practices of rest and recuperation and not rushing to decide on action steps.
In the months since writing this letter I have only come to feel more clear that this shift is the right one for me.
My devotion to working for life and Earth has not changed, but I expect it will take shape in new ways that will look quite different from the social change organizing and activism I have done to date. The shifts I have been going through for the past 2-3 years feel like they are bringing me to some important clarity that will allow my work going forward to be even more clear-minded and clear-hearted -- and more truly authentic to who I am and what I have to offer the cause.
And I am also as committed as ever to making these offerings in community -- because in community is the only way we can truly act from our deepest power. So expect to be hearing from me when the timing feels right! :)
Thanks so much for your support! If you'd like to engage about this or anything else, I can be reached here.
January 21, 2022
Dear friends,
I have recently determined that I need to step back from my role as National Director and the day to day management of Move to Amend.
I came to this decision to step back after much soul searching and reflection over the past many months, and my decision is based on two things, both personal –
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The timing of this stepping back is due to my health. As many of you know, I had a scare with ovarian cancer five years ago. I was extremely lucky when my surgeon was able to remove all of it when they first discovered it, and so far so good in terms of no sign of it coming back. But after my surgery I developed extreme rheumatoid arthritis, and for almost a year I could hardly move my hands or walk without excruciating pain. Through all of this I was working, as the work helped me keep going. Unfortunately the medicines I was prescribed didn’t do a thing to help with the pain or inflammation so I found other ways to get my symptoms into remission, mostly through learning a lot about inflammatory foods and stress reduction practices. I had remarkable success and recovered to better health than I had been in even before my cancer.
But over the past few years my arthritis symptoms have started to return, and my inflammation levels have gone back up to higher than they were when my cancer appeared. What I tried before isn’t really helping like it did and so I have been doing some work inward and redoubling my efforts to listen to my body and work with it instead of override it. In that listening I received some pretty clear and urgent messages that I need to change some fundamental aspects of the way I do my life, especially around my work.
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The other factor in coming to my decision is my heart. I have dedicated 20+ years to building a radical democracy movement in the United States, first at Democracy Unlimited of Humboldt County and then at Move to Amend. My belief in democracy and community and the need for a transformative revolution in this country is unshaken.
But my heart is having a very hard time focusing on Congresscritters and the politics of Washington DC, or even on laws and societal institutions. Instead what it wants to think about is how to personally and collectively face the existential questions that climate collapse puts before us.
My vision is that we survive the looming collapse of civilization as a species -- but that as a species we evolve to understand and internalize what we have done, how to make sure we never do it again, and how we should be instead to take responsibility and accountability for our collective colonization of Earth, and the animals, people and plants with whom we share this planet -- to earn our way as a species to be worthy of staying on this planet.
I have a lot of thoughts about how we go about surviving in a way that is worthy of the planet and building something that is both new and different, and wise and old in the wreckage that human civilization is leaving in its wake. I don’t know how we get there, but I do know that the only way we will get there is to start to act like we will. But it is important that we act from the actual place where we are. And so far, all of our political and cultural leaders are acting like either, a) we don’t need to change or b) we can change the system before the system collapses.
I don’t believe we can change the system before it collapses. I’ve come to feel this in a way that doesn’t fill me with fear and denial but in a straightforward acceptance. And my intuition tells me I need to lean into this acceptance even more. This isn’t what I want! This isn’t what I hoped for! But it is how it is.
So what are we going to do about it?? I’ve been asking myself, given all this, what should *I* be doing? I have some initial thoughts – and I absolutely believe that action is more potent and meaningful when taken collectively, so this is definitely not a letter telling you I’m retreating on some inner journey away from politics. But I do need some more space in my life to do some more inner work before I’m ready to get to it.
In struggling to tune into my body (and it has been a struggle for me!) I’ve recognized how the colonization of our planet and each other that we all participate in by being made of this culture, often starts with our own bodies! After all, our bodies are the most earthy part of us, and our culture teaches us to disconnect, override, use, hate, resent, and abuse them. I understood this on an intellectual level before, but it has been very different to actually listen to my body tell me how that alienation feels to her. Damn.
I want to be clear that I’m definitely not the only one on the National Team with a wider and larger vision for humanity than the We the People Amendment, or who is struggling with the existential questions that climate collapse (+ industrial civilization collapse?) lays before us. In fact, no one on the team sees the Amendment as an end in and of itself, and we never have!
At the same time, I share the belief that our work at Move to Amend is an important piece of the puzzle. Both to help people understand the structural hypocrisies of the U.S. Empire, and how this country has never been a real democracy, and also to help people understand that the democracy we have been promised is part of the answer of what we need to build a culture that isn’t rooted in exploitative capitalism but is instead rooted in mutual aid and solidarity for the earth and her peoples (human and otherwise).
But over the past few years I have been struggling to offer Move to Amend strategic direction or leadership that I feel happy about. For a long time stepping back didn’t feel like an option, but thanks to my practice of listening to my body, I now see that at this time, for me, it is necessary. And once I said it out loud it became clear that my stepping back as National Director will serve Move to Amend as well.
To the question of “who will take over” for me, the answer is, the group. The reality is that I have already stepped back from a great deal of the day to day efforts over the past year, and my colleagues have stepped up, both ably and effectively. We have long wanted to further collectivize the national leadership of the organization, but having a founder and longtime director in the room can make that a challenge. I’m used to coming up with the answers and everyone is used to asking me for the answers! Even as we try to make shifts, the culture we already have can get in the way. Sometimes the best course is for the leader to step back and truly make room for others. (At least until the group culture has shifted to allow others to claim their own positions of leadership.)
I’m not sure what I’ll be doing next, but if you’re interested I’d be happy to keep you posted. In the short term I will be packing up and selling my house that I co-own with my ex. We will be legally disentangling from each others’ lives (which means I lose my health insurance, so need to figure that one out). I will be moving back to New Mexico after 23 years to be near my family. I will continue to lean into my passion for understanding systems, which these days has me exploring tuning into the lunar cycle, astrology, the I-Ching, and Human Design. I will continue to be a steward of cats and bees, and flowers and herbs, and of my body.
(Regretfully) I will also need to pay the bills, but I have faith that I’ll continue to find ways to make sure my career supports my soul, and not the other way around. When I think about what I want my work to be, I keep coming back to using my skills of facilitation, consensus, listening, and understanding people and groups to lead people back to themselves so they can face this moment with their most true, most creative, and most powerful selves.
The only part that feels hard about stepping back is risking losing the relationships I have with all of you and with the national team. From my perspective, there’s no reason why we can’t continue to find ways to work together going forward – but I also don’t know for sure what that might be and how it might look. But I trust that we can if we want to, and that what is meant to be, will be.
In terms of what that looks like within the scope of Move to Amend, I feel very clear that that is for the National Team to decide – I definitely don’t want to be one of those founders/directors who “steps back” but who is also looking over everyone’s shoulder and second guessing the group’s ability to take ownership. I’m here to help by invitation and when the group feels there’s something I can help with.
I want to thank Alfonso, Greg, Jennie, Jessica, Milly, and Shelly for all their work and for taking on even more as I’m stepping back. You all are super duper lucky to get to work with them! They are wise, experienced, creative, and capable beyond measure. Treat them well, and appreciate all the ways that they give to this organization. As we have let you know already, some of them will be transitioning to work more with Democracy Unlimited in the coming months, but know that for all of us this work is all related.
I also want to thank Daniel, George, Jason, Joni, Keyan, Leila, Saleem, and Tara for steadfastly helping to steer this organization and for offering vision and guidance as board members to me and the rest of the staff. I hope more of you will step up to join the board and help do the work of making sure that the national arm of the organization is both supporting and educating/radicalizing our grassroots base.
And I want to thank you so much for the ways that you give. Co-building Move to Amend with all of you will be one of the greatest accomplishments of my life, always. Because no matter what happens with the Amendment, another world is only possible because people like us are daring to dream it.
Our ability to vision a different world wouldn’t be possible if people who came before us had not dared to dream it, and we must be those people for those who will come after us. That’s just the way it is. That’s what’s needed to ensure that justice, and solidarity, and accountability, and love, are part of human evolution and Earth’s evolution.
Thank you for being and doing your part. ✊💗🌍
Much love,
Kaitlin Sopoci-Belknap